No words

I wonder if a blog is a good idea. It is really just a diary isn't it? And who wants to read the ramblings of my mind? Do I? Today I am back online, I haven't had many words to write lately....or perhaps I've been avoiding writing down my thoughts lest they are offensive.

A psychiatrist, and I've met many in my line of work, once said to me "migration is not natural". This has stuck with me for many years and every now and then I ponder its validity. Is it true? Many animals migrate on a seasonal or cyclical basis...all very natural...all for a distinct purpose. Granted usually the migration is temporary and they often return to their 'home' again until the next season. So what about people? Certainly we migrate for a purpose, the pursuit of money, a different lifestyle, safety, happiness. Some of us return to our homes and others don't. By nature we are much more complex than animals so are our migratory patterns and purposes destined to be a mystery?

Today migration seems very unnatural. As I head out today I will drive on the right side of the road, instead of the left. I will fetch my children from a school where they wear no uniforms and where the majority of children go to and from school on the classic old American school bus. I will talk to parents who are chatting about summer plans, most of which involve summer camps for their children, many are sleep away camps, some children go away for 7-8 weeks over the summer without their parents. I not only don't understand this I am appalled by it. I will take my children to sports that they are unfamiliar with, in a town filled with families and their history...none that we are a part of. I will use dreary grey money to buy products I am not really familiar with, count out nickels and pennies to people who often don't even understand what I am saying even though we speak the same language. This week-end is memorial day...I had to Google it. What is it? Does it mean anything to me?

I am a stranger in a strange land and today I want to keep it that way. I will say no thank you to invitations to play tennis, to have lunch and to go for a walk. To my detriment? Yes. For my survival? Yes. I need to be me in my house with my things, listening to my favourite Australian radio station so I can hear familiar accents and hear about people and places I feel a part of. Until this feeling passes I will ring my Australian friends and my South African family and I will bake South African treats and perhaps have an Aussie BBQ and I will try to forget that I am an alien.